Are you close to your friends from high school? Do you still speak to them and see them around town?
I do, for the most part anyway. Especially considering that I live in the same town as where I went to high school.
Yesterday I did my usual surf of the online newspaper of my town, and hit the obituaries section as usual too. And I saw this posting for a girl who had died a few days earlier and she was born in my hometown, same age, and graduated from my high school the same year I did, but I didn't think I knew her.
I searched for her on Facebook (like any good detective) and actually, indeed, yes, I knew her! I was friends with her even. We were in classes together and had band together.
How did I not think I knew her??
Well, for one thing, she looks totally different now then she did in high school, and she got married, so her last name was not the same.
I continued my detective work and learned that she married her husband in 2009, same year I married my husband, and they just moved back to town six months ago, bought a house, had a baby, and a few weeks later, the husband dies suddenly of a heart attack. Then, she, my friend from high school, killed herself just weeks after, leaving behind their two and a half month old daughter, a dog, and a cat, a new house, and lots of shocked friends and family.
Wow. (Were you thinking wow too?)
What a difference six months makes! I looked at their wedding photos, and they looked so happy, so in love. And now those two people don't walk among us anymore.
My heart broke into pieces. Knowing that I knew her, and that we lived in the same town when she died. Oh man, could I have helped to prevent this tragedy?
I could only imagine her parents and parents-in-law. What are they going through? All was good and lovely just months before and now all of this mess.
One of the things that I believe strongly is that I trust in the Lord and that He puts me in the right place at the right time, always. I usually lean on this phrase whenever something bad happens around me or to me, and I can say that phrase and know that God is in control still and He knew that I would be put in those situations.
But knowing that I wasn't aware of this heart break starting last December with her husband's death, and that she was mentally ill from it, I should continue to believe in my thought that God has put me in the right place at the right time, and that God didn't involve me for a reason, because I was unaware. But that is hard for me to swallow. I wish I was made aware before she decided to take her own life. But, I wasn't. So what do I do from here, now knowing what I do?
Well, for starters, I can continue to put trust in the Lord that he is in control, and that my friend and her husband are together with God and no longer in pain. I can pray that their families find peace in this fact and that the baby grows up knowing only love, and not heart ache. I can pray to God that if I may ever be of service to the family in the future, that He puts me in position to, whatever that service may be.
And, finally, I can continue to live my life, and fill my days with love, because I do not know when my last day here will be, so I will live each day like my last.
